Revisit Yourself

Aspire

suzannahscully — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 21:43:42 +0000

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what I want the next steps in my career to look like. Now that I’m a stay-at-home Mom, I’ve noticed my interests and my time have been shifting. While I used to have a clear view of where I wanted to go in my career, it has now changed. What do I aspire to do? This is an interesting question that I have been playing around with and I think that it is important for everyone to do at any life stage. We know where we are, but where are we going?

One of the key ways to do this is to think about someone who inspires you. Someone whose life or career you find to be particularly interesting. It doesn’t have to be someone you directly know. I’ve been doing this myself, researching online some key players in my industry to see what it is that they are doing or how they have built their careers. The next step would be to reach out to them to establish a mentor role. (yikes – did I just commit myself to doing that?)

Whether you are working in a corporate job or you are an entrepreneur, look to your leaders. What are they doing or have they done that you could do? Are they someone whose lifestyle you would want to emulate? And if not, are you on the right career path for you? I remember when I used to work in the corporate world and I’d look to my bosses and realize that their lifestyle was not what I wanted my life to be like. It wasn’t right for me. What’s right for you?

I love the thoughts/stories that people have been emailing me, please keep them up!

For more info on this, check out my latest Examiner article about how to test drive your dream job – http://bit.ly/DLdvs

“Man cannot aspire if he looked down; if he rise, he must look up.”

-Samuel Smiles

Should

suzannahscully — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 17:56:33 +0000

I consider “should” a four letter word. When you say that you should do something or should like something, it is said with an assumed duty. When you make a decision using the word should, you are placing the opinions of others over your own. A perfect example of this is a client of mine who was dating a girl that he “should” like. She was perfect on paper, tall, good looking, smart, funny but there wasn’t a spark, only a “should”. I can also speak for myself that for too many years I stayed in a career that I thought I “should” like because I was paid well and got to do a lot of seemingly cool things. How many of us are “shoulding” all over ourselves?? (Say that quickly and get the double meaning.)

There are times in life when doing something you should do is the right thing to do. Like, “I should send them a nice thank you note.” Yes, you should. Cases such as those are usually related to manners. But what about in the rest of your life? What are you doing that you think you should do and not what you want to do?

When it comes to your career and what you think you “should” do, check out my most recent article in the Examiner: http://tinyurl.com/kl9uya

Do you agree with what I’ve said above? Disagree? Have a great example of this? Shoot me an email, I’d love to hear your should stories!

Clear the Air

suzannahscully — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 18:02:49 +0000

For some reason over the past few weeks I have had a lot of instances where I have felt the need to clear the air with people. I even mustered up the courage last week to approach someone who was always rude to me for no reason. Though I was quite nervous to do it, I felt so exhilarated and free after that it almost makes me want to clear the air with many more people. Notice how I said “almost”? Why is confrontation so uncomfortable? Why do we let our thoughts and feelings build up inside of us to where we are in a state of constant frustration with someone instead of just saying something? Feeling resentful doesn’t help anyone out, especially you.

Think about someone right now in your life who you’d really like the clear the air with. What do you want to say to that person? Even as I wrote that, I felt my shoulders release and I exhaled. Let this be the week of clearing the air. And maybe even as a first step, you can do it by emailing me with someone who is really frustrating you just to get it off of your chest. No judgments, 100% confidential. I can take it.

In other news, I am now the resident SF Career Coach for the Examiner. I will be writing a few times a week on topics related to how to be happier in your career. I would love for you to check out my articles and let me know what you think! http://www.examiner.com/x-21112-SF-Career-Coach-Examiner

Soul Intention

suzannahscully — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 19:35:28 +0000

I read this phrase today, “fulfilling your soul’s intention” and it made me stop and think. We often hear what one’s “sole intention” is, but that is entirely different than your soul’s intention. I can honestly say that for so long I was concerned with what I should be doing or what my life should be like. I was spinning in a million directions, always busy but never getting anywhere. In fact, I didn’t really even know where I was trying to go! I just knew I had to do it quicker and better than the next person. And then about two years ago, I burnt out and finally stopped to figure out what it was that I want out of my life. And now reading the phrase, I realize that I finally listened to my soul’s intention. I can honestly say that it changed my life. I know it may sound hokey or “woo-woo” but really think about the meaning behind the phrase.

We were all put here for a reason. There is something that we are all meant to do or contribute to this world. All of our souls have an intention, what’s yours?

Expectations Ruin Experiences

suzannahscully — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 20:59:05 +0000

As my friends and family have heard me say a million times, “expectations ruin experiences”. How many times have you been so excited for something and when you actually experience it, it doesn’t meet your expectations? It’s not to say that the experience wasn’t great, it is just that it wasn’t as great as you expected it to be. Hence, expectations ruin experiences.

I recently read about a study done that shows that Denmark is the happiest nation in the world. And what did they find to be the major contributing factor to this level of happiness among Danes? Low expectations. Of course you could argue that if you expect the worst, you get the worst. But that is not what I am saying. I am saying that too many times we over think things. We don’t allow what is to be just that.

What high expectations are you holding right now? Or was there a recent disappointment that you can attribute to unrealistic expectations?

Changing Course

suzannahscully — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 22:03:33 +0000

I once had a client tell me that she wasn’t very good at “changing her course”, meaning that once she had a plan; she stuck to it even if it was no longer the right thing to do. I thought this was really interesting. How many of us get really set on something whether it be a career path, a relationship or deciding to move somewhere and follow through on it even if our hearts are no longer in it? I’m not a sailor but I imagine that once you set sail on a trip, the course changes depending on extraneous factors. But why don’t we do this in our own lives?

I challenge everyone to think about what is happening in your own life that you’ve been following through on “just because”? And if you were to change course, what would that change be?

“If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.”

-Lao Tzu

Meant to Be

suzannahscully — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 22:02:58 +0000

As you may or may not know, we had a beautiful baby boy on February 15^th named Logan Jack Scully. I am sure that I could write a novel on my experiences to date but one of the things that it has sparked in me is noticing how I am already predicting what career path he’ll take. For example, he was an early talker (and by talker, I mean “coo, gaa, eee”) and so I immediately thought, he’s going to be a politician or an actor. And it made me think about how few of us actually go on to do something that is in line with our natural talents.

When you were little, did your parents think you were going to be a Sr. Distribution Analyst? Or an Assistant Production Research Manager? Obviously there is nothing wrong with these positions but I’m curious how many of you have gone into fields where your natural talents are being used? How many of you can say that what you do is a reflection of who you are? In this tough economy, not many of us have that luxury. But what about outside of work? What are you doing that supports your natural talents? Do you know what your natural talents are?

With Ease

suzannahscully — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 22:02:07 +0000

Things are as easy or as difficult as you make them out to be. It is amazing how in our heads we can tell ourselves stories to make things out to be so dire. And how two people can look at the exact same situation with such different perspectives. One seeing opportunity and one seeing a dead end. One seeing loss and difficulty and one seeing triumph and ease. It is all how you perceive it. I have a good exercise to demonstrate how doing the same thing with two different perspectives can give you different outcomes.

Try taking a deep breath each of these two ways:

First: Tighten up every muscle in your body, including the muscles in your face. Now try to take a deep breath.

Second: Relax every muscle in your body and take a deep breath.

Do you see how much deeper of a breath you are able to take when every muscle is relaxed? If you approach any situation with ease, the action becomes effortless. Even though you are performing the same action, you just made it a lot easier on yourself. And isn’t that what we all want?
In this time when people are being laid off, money is tight and holiday stresses are upon us, think about how you can approach this next month with ease. How can you make things easier on yourself? What story are you telling yourself that is making something out to be harder than it needs to be?

Pareto Principle

suzannahscully — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 22:01:01 +0000

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the Pareto Principle, also known as the “80-20 rule”. It states that for many events 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes. This principle was named after Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto who studied and found that 20% of the population controlled 80% of Italy’s wealth and income. Later studies have been done to show this principle rings true in many areas. For example:

20% of your wardrobe is worn 80% of the time.

20% of clients account for 80% of an organization’s income.

20% of streets account for 80% of traffic.

20% of your friends account for 80% of your satisfaction.

How do we apply this to our life? It all comes back to thinking efficiently and getting better results. Doing less, gaining more. How great is that?! I heard one speaker who figured out that in an eight hour work day, 96 minutes works out to be 20% of our day. So if we focused basically an hour and half of our entire day on accomplishing something really important, 80% of the results we are looking for will follow. Everything on top of that is gravy.

My question for you is, what are you doing 80% of the time that is only accounting for 20% of your results? And how could you flip that equation in your life or work?

In the Zone

suzannahscully — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 21:59:59 +0000

A friend of mine recently passed on a New York Times article that talked about the importance of relaxation for professional athletes. The article was not talking about relaxation before a competition; it talked about the importance of it during a competition. One of the key examples was Michael Phelps at this year’s Olympics. No one has ever seen a swimmer so relaxed in the water. I also remember watching Jamaican sprinter Usain Bolt at the Olympics. I remember being amazed by how nonchalant he looked when he ran. His face looked as if he was taking a relaxed stroll in a park, yet his speed was mind blowing. One of the best ways to describe this feeling of relaxation for athletes is that they are simply in the zone. It is when your mind and body are in sync. To relax does not mean to slow down, it means to allow your body to do what it wants to do and for your head to get out of the way.

I thought about this in my own life. How when I am really stressed or when I want to be successful at something but I am finding it really difficult, that is when I am getting in my own way. It is time to get “in the zone”. So, how does one get into this state of mind? You block out all negative and self defeating thoughts and you focus on the goal that you want to achieve. And you take it a step further than that in that you visualize the end goal in your mind. That achieving thought should be the only thing that enters your mind. Any other thoughts you have will only slow you down.

Where in your life do you need to get out of your own way and get into the zone?

“The only one who can beat me is me.”

-Michael Johnson – Olympic Gold Medalist